By Jamie Mason Cohen, Resilience Speaker
What I’ve learned about the kind of feedback most people really want (based on approximately 5000 1-1 coaching-graphotherapy sessions) that I do after my keynotes for attendees:
When I ask people if they want me to tell them the positive and the constructive, 99.5% say they want both. What I realize in this almost universal response is that people are open to trusting a person who combines the warmth and competence to offer them feedback that:
– enthusiastically acknowledges a strength that they may have taken for granted and encourages them to optimize that gift more into the world.
– empathizes without judgment about a potential blindspot.
Once the blindspot is bravely acknowledged, it’s up to the coach to ask the right questions, be the guide on the side and help the person discover how to help themselves take the next step.
Tone matters. It’s not just what you say, it’s how you say it. The art is in how you say it so that each person can hear it. Listening is the speaker or coach’s responsibility almost as much as the listener’s. Your tone speaks so loud, I can or can’t hear what you’re really saying.
Seen here at my January 2020 keynote for Meeting Planners International (MPIGNY).
